Heads or Tails

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way--in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

Thousands died on 9/11, and thousands of innocent people are dying in Afghanistan, and Iraq. America waged two wars in Asia after 9/11. And, like any other war, American soldiers are losing their lives, and taking lives of many innocent people who have nothing to do with the doctrine of Bin Laden or any other fundamentalist group out there.

For American Muslims, August was probably the worst month. Muslims were called a lot of names in the media, all because they wanted to build a community centre near Ground Zero. The issue of Islamic extremism was plastered over and discussed on every single news channel. But, what the media refused to acknowledge, explicitly, was that the elements of extremism also exist in their American society. Fanatics like Pastor Terry Jones, Pamela Geller and the Fox News clan, in my humble opinion, belong under the extremism umbrella. They are doing an awesome job in dividing the American society and deteriorating peace. If you objectively look at the narrative of Al-Qaeda (Bin Laden clan) and right-wing ignorant Americans (The Fox News clan) they are the same. Their narrative is antagonizing, offensive, manipulative, and simply hatefully ignorant.

I am typing this as I am watching 60 Minutes' cover story, A Relentless Enemy, about the war in Afghanistan. Lara Logan reports, American lives are in danger in Afghanistan. They are being attacked by unknown Afghans and Pakistanis, when all the Americans want in return is peace.

This is expected when the war Americans are fighting is so abstract. The "War on Terror" is a very abstract phrase. What is terror? Who are terrorists? These two terminologies have never been clearly defined. And, yet so many of our soldiers (both American and Canadian) have lost their lives in the past 9 years. My heart goes out to them as much as my heart goes out to the innocent civilians who lose their lives everyday. Sometimes because of the drone attacks. What I find so inhumane about the drone attacks is that in the eyes of Americans these civilians are so worthless that they can just die by a machine with the push of a button. The lives of these civilians are so worthless that they don't even deserve to die by someone who would be able to experience the direct repercussions of his or her actions. The lives of these civilians are so worthless that they don't even deserve to get killed by a human, but by a machine; just like how animals are slaughtered by a machine in an assembly line.

There are peace loving Americans. And, there are peace loving Muslims. The moderates, which I believe is the majority, want the same thing - peace. But sadly their message gets lost and never crosses over to the other side.

The problem we are faced with is that we never see both sides of story. The wars in Afghanistan and Iraq have two different narrations, "theirs" and "ours". Now that the war in Iraq is supposedly "over" we may term it a victory, but the country is still unstable. We may call the Karzai government in Afghanistan a democracy, in other words a success, but his government is extremely corrupt. Just like there are always two sides of the same story, there are extremists on both ends of the "West vs. Islam" spectrum. Until we don't recognize the similarities between the two extremist camps we would be stuck in the same abyss, which is the war on terror.

Justin Halpern: Sh*t My Dad Says

I like to eavesdrop on other people's conversations when I go out to eat. My sister shares this secret shame with me. Trust me this is not because we are snoopy, it's just usually we have nothing interesting to say to each other, so we rely on other people to entertain us. Recently, when I was out having dinner, there was a group of friends sitting at a table next to mine. Judging the way they were showing off their phones, it seemed that they had not seen each other for a while, and had recently reconnected thanks to the mighty Facebook. It is amusing that now when long lost friends have reunions they feel the need to whip out their cellphones, and marvel on the little wonders their gizmo can do.

Technology has changed our social behaviour at such an exponential rate that sometimes we need blunt people like Justin Halpern's father to provide an honest social commentary.

Son, no one gives a sh*t about all the things your cell phone does. You didn't invent it, you just bought it. Anybody can do that.

Sh*t My Dad Says is a "LOL-funny" book (memoir) based on Halpern's Twitter account. Halpern started tweeting about the random stuff his father says, which not only got him this book deal, but he also has a sitcom with the same title premiering this fall. This book is another testament of the way technology now allows us to share our ideas with millions. Thanks to blogging and tweeting people have the possibility of getting their work published without having to worry about running after publishers and literary agents.

I really enjoyed reading this hilarious book. So if you are looking for a light read do check it out.

Here is my favourite sh*t Justin Halpern's Dad said:

On Chivalry

Give your mother the front seat...I don't give a sh*t if she said you could have it, that's what she's supposed to do, and you're supposed to say, 'No, I insist.' You think I'm gonna drive around with my wife in the backseat and a nine-year-old in the front? You're a crazy son of a b*tch.

For the Sanctity of the F-Word

Okay, I am confused. The movie tells me that if a guy doesn't call you, doesn't ask you out, makes you wait on him, doesn't want to plan stuff, doesn't want to go out, doesn't want to move in together, doesn't want to have kids...HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.

Is it really that simple? So, what if the guy is shy? Or, what if, when you are busy being coy, the guy arrives at the conclusion that you are not interested in him, and the fear of rejection stops him from making the move, you have been waiting for?

I get confused with these dating guidelines. I would find it endearing if people just went for what they wanted. Both girls, and boys. I like to think that I am an upfront person, and if the opportunity presents itself I wouldn't have any qualms about asking the guy out. We are supposed to be beyond sexism. Equal opportunities for all. Do what we please. So why slow down the dating process with these stupid rules? Who benefits from these stupid rules, anyway? The "Self Help" book industry? And, the "feminists" at Cosmo?

Okay, so this is what I have against Cosmopolitan. The periodical's former editor, self-proclaimed feminist, skeletal Helen Gurley Brown, once said that girls should have border-line anorexia nervosa to maintain an "ideal" body weight. Cosmo, the 80 year old magazine, instead of writing about women in politics, or positive female role models, primarily focuses on "How to Please Your Man", "What Men Like", "Where to Find Eligible Bachelors", and other male-centric topics. Okay, I realize nobody wants to read about the brutalities women are faced with in Darfur and Congo. But, why they are turning their readers into predatory men-hunting sex slaves is beyond me.

Then there are the other delusional feminists, the "Sex and the City" clowns. They believe, men are like shoes, wear them and then dispose them off. These women use feminism to liberate themselves from any moral and/or social obligations. Look, I love pretty outfits as much as the next girl, but since when did it become okay to spend our entire paycheck on our wardrobe? And, now, they are coming up with another "Sex and the City" movie. Hey, at least these women are helping the economy, Paul Krugman style.

And, I don't get the Oprah cult either. Oprah started bugging me back when she plastered her stamp of approval on James Frey's dubious A Million Little Pieces. Later, when it was discovered that Frey exaggerated the truth, and his book was more fictional and less of a druggie hero's triumphal memoir, she called him on her show to yell at him. Dude, Oprah, didn't you have a moral responsibility to check the book's credentials before you endorsed it? And, what is with the "O" logo mugs, which are sold for 12 bucks each? And, if we are supposed to love ourselves first, and be comfortable with our body, embrace all body shapes and forms; then why is Oprah so critical of her own weight gain? Look, I respect the woman's rags to riches story, but I don't respect her bogus commercialism tactics.

By the way, to the future object of my affection, if I am ignoring you, please don't think I am not just that into you. Take my bizarre behaviour as a cue to ask me out :). And, don't ever quote The Secret to me! Don't ever tell me that some bizarre law of attraction brought us together! And, if you dig a girl who avidly reads Cosmo and its clones, remember this sort of "feminism" can backfire too:

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML

EDIT (2:44 PM): I just read it in the news that Oprah apologized to James Frey for shaming him on her show. Looks like blogging does have some journalistic relevance after all.

Nikolai Gogol: The Overcoat

In an Apatow world, socially stunted, slobby, scruffy men somehow manage to have attractive blond girlfriends. These men do not really have to work on their social skills, and Mary Jane problem to find love. It is no wonder these Apatow movies turn out to be blockbuster hits, eh?



But, in the real world we get surprised when "less attractive" individuals actually amount to something. For instance, look at the recent, okay not so recent, YouTube sensation, British Susan Boyle. When she first stepped on the stage, the audience and the judges were ready to write her off, but out came that powerful voice, and she had everyone mesmerized. Had she been a Barbie look-alike, people on this side of the pond, probably, would have never heard of her.

Nikolai Gogol's stories are about such "less attractive" social outcasts. He wrote about social nobodies who work in the corrupt government offices. Gogol had hoped to achieve literary success when he moved to St. Petersburg from Ukraine. But, he had trouble finding his footing in the corrupt imperial capital.

"The Overcoat" centers around Akaky Akakievich, who is a government clerk. Akaky Akakievich not only has an unfortunate name, but is also poor, lonely, and unattractive. He spends his day copying government documents, and getting teased by his co-workers. When his old worn-out overcoat reaches the condition where it's beyond repair, Akaky decides to buy a pristine new overcoat, which he cannot afford. He decides to save up, by skipping dinner, and going without the basic utilities. His sole purpose of existence, which was previously about his menial job, now becomes about buying the new overcoat.

Gogol's stories are about people whose lives are marked by anonymity and oblivion. These individuals find themselves lost in a society, where they are judged on their physical appearances, funny names, and inferior social ranks.

I believe, the reason reality shows like "American Idol", or "Britain's Got Talent" are popular, because they give individuals, like Taylor Hicks, Paul Potts, and Susan Boyle, a chance to do something outside of their social realms. In most cases, the contestants are not restricted by their physical appearance, and/or socio-economic status.

Survival of the Fittest

Often times when I think of contemporary Pakistan, I wonder what my life would be like, if I lived there. I think about the rich Pakistanis, in their fancy air-conditioned cars. I think about rich people driving hummers, in the narrow crowded streets of Karachi, Pakistan's largest city. I think about the small percentage of Pakistanis who are rich, speak fluent and proper British English in their Anglicized-Indian accents. I think about the rich Pakistanis with better health care plans than the average American.

Then these words of Charles Dickens' come to mind.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

I believe, the above passage effectively describes the contradictions one finds in Pakistan. Pakistan is full of surprises, inconsistencies, and cultural shocks. The only way to survive a trip is to shut off your brain, and leave it at home. My parents are from Pakistan, and after spending every single high school summer in Pakistan, I still cannot fully understand this country of pretences. I cannot seem to find my place in their society.

Last week, The New York Times did a cover piece about Pakistan. The article was centered around Pakistan's bleak future, under Asif Ali Zardari's presidency. The cover story had a picture of Asif Ali Zardari sitting in front of a big portrait of the country's founder, Muhammad Ali Jinnah. On the table to his right, there rests a closeup framed photo of his late wife, Benazir Bhutto. On the table to his left, there is a framed photo of Ms. Bhutto taken at a political rally. In front of the said picture there is a Kleenex box, depicting Zardari's sensitivity. If anyone out there knows how to send out a pictorial message of patriotism, spousal devotion, and sensitivity, it is definitely the people who orchestrated this photo shoot.

Pakistan is a country where the rich are ostentatiously rich, and the poor are extremely poor. The weak government is corrupted. The country is in the epicentre of terrorism, both by the government and the Taliban insurgents.

The country is in shambles. Which prompts the question, what happens to failed nations? In 60+ years of its independence, Pakistan has never had a stable government. People are dying of hunger, infectious diseases, and illiteracy. The Urdu language, Pakistan's official language, is dying.

So, who should bail out Pakistan? What happens to failed states? Who comes to their rescue? Bush believed he was saving Iraqis from Saddam Hussein. G20 nations have their own economic problems to overcome. But, at the same time there are flattering nations like Pakistan, Haiti, Myanmar, which need our immediate focus. Or, is it all about survival of the fittest? Something I know Dwight Schtrute would attest to:

Michael Scott: No no no no, I mean have this kind of party. I look around and I see all these beautiful people who are alone on Valentine's and I think that there are other single people out there too. We just need to find 'em. There's a girl out there for all of us. Maybe even in this office park. There has to be a way to get all these lonely people together.

Dwight Schrute: What do you have in mind?

Michael Scott: I was thinking maybe like a mixer.

Dwight Schrute: Oh God that's a terrible idea.

Michael Scott: Old-fashioned meat market. I don't think it is.

Dwight Schrute: No. Lonely people mixing with one another? Breeding? Creating an even lonelier generation? You're not even allowing natural selection do its work. Pssh. You're like the guy who invented the seat belt.

The Office

I am hoping, The Office fans would appreciate the above picture :).

In other television ramblings, I am really enjoying the new comedy called "Better Off Ted". Since it's 2ish in the morning, and I am absolutely tired, I would just share with you what The New York Times has to say about this hilarious show.

The show's satirical sense of humour is on the same par as say The Office, and 30 Rock. The last two episodes were HILARIOUS. So give this show a try, before the mighty mouse (ABC) cancels it for some other Paris Hilton wannabe reality show.

You Made a Mistake

I am writing this post with all the stereotypical Canadian politeness, to inform you, my dear American readers, that you made a mistake by electing Barack Obama in the midst of the global economic crisis.

So ever wonder where all the taxpayer dollars are going?
Well apparently, your elitist of a President thinks, the phrase "War on Terror" is just not zen enough. War on Terror shall now be referred as "Overseas Contingency Operation". Yes, we get it Obama you went to Harvard, and you have written two books, but why must you turn war into a snobfest is beyond me. Furthermore, terrorist attacks will now be called "MAN-made Disasters", which sounds extremely sexist. Seriously, whatever happened to equal opportunities for all?!

As Jon Stewart mentioned, Obama wants you to start calling the Obesity Epidemic as "Enhanced Biological Jollification", which sounds so much more palatable, eh? My advice to all the haters out there: Instead of blaming immigrants for stealing your jobs and money, blame the linguists for coming up with this huggy-feely Orwellian speak.

Obama's recent no-expense spared trip to London to resolve the global economic crisis, ought to have put some serious dent in the American budget-wallet. The guy is travelling with his own personal chef. Way to stick it to the Brits, eh?

In Obama's defence, he maybe a diva, but he has transcended geographical barriers, and created jobs for other black look-alike men. Look how far we have come. Here is a black man selling a South Korean made car:



Also, I love The Office for introducing a black character as Michael Scott's boss. Nothing cracks me up more than the fact how Angela and Kelly Kapoor are going all ga-ga over this new black dapper authority figure. Obamamania, anyone?!

Oh, Obama, the ways in which you have undone your wrongs.

Nikolai Gogol: The Nose

I read this second short-story of Nikolai Gogol's a month ago, but just didn't get a chance to write about it. It is hard to discuss this particular satirical story without ruining it. Furthermore, the story, as Gogol admitted himself, does not make much sense.

The Nose is about magical realism. A theme one may find in Woody Allen's movies, Family Guy, and South Park.



I was watching South Park the other day, and the Episode 1205 seemed awfully similar to Gogol's story, which was published in 1836. Only in the case of The Nose, the protagonist, Collegiate Assessor Kovalyov, wakes up one day to find that his nose is missing. Yes, his actual, physical nose. Some critics have hypothesized that the disappearance of the nose is seen as a castration complex. Others have argued that maybe the story is biographical, since Gogol was insecure about his nose, apparently.

Whatever the case, the story is well-written, and very HILARIOUS. As, I mentioned before, what strikes me the most about Gogol's writing is the fact how relevant his narrative is.

In his life Gogol's work was censored, because he had the courage to criticize the government. Similarly, I feel, it is in shows like South Park where we get to truly see our society's double-standards, and ignorance. For instance, as far as I know, only South Park has been able to truly point out the hypocrisy behind The Jonas Brothers, and the cloning factory that is the Disney Network. Well, South Park, and the Onion.


Disney Lab Unveils Its Latest Line Of Genetically Engineered Child Stars

A few centuries from now, that is if the world ends up surviving the economic and climate crises, I could see people studying South Park to mock our ignorance.

Urmmm...okay, I am done ranting.

Nikolai Gogol: Diary of a Madman

One of my resolutions for this year is to read Russian literature. I was sharing this ambitious and rather suicidal goal of mine with my sister; and here is her response: "Make sure you also put down 'MUST NOT KILL MYSELF' as a resolution too." My dad, who is fluent in Russian, has been encouraging me to read Nikolai Gogol (in English, of course) since I was in middle school. He got me Nikolai Gogol's Dead Souls when I was a mere tween. And, people wonder why I am so morbid. So I finally caved in to parental pressure, and gaily cracked open my first Gogol: Diary of a Madman.

Diary of a Madman is a satirical and the most hilarious tragedy I have ever read. This short-story was written by Gogol in 1834, during Tsar Nicholas I's oppressive regime. Gogol wrote, ironically, to Pushkin: "Diary of a Madman met with a rather unpleasant little snag from the censor yesterday. But thank God things are a little better today. At least, all I have to do is throw out the best parts."

The story is set in imperial St Petersburg, my favourite Russian city. Gogol mocks Russian government offices, clerical staff, and social hierarchy through the insignificant eyes of the protagonist. Ivanovich, the Madman who writes these entries in his diary, sometimes refrains from writing about his love for the General's daughter.

The protagonist, in some ways, reminded me of the recurring character on SNL, Penelope, played by the amazing Kristen Wiig. Penelope is awfully hilarious yet a very annoying one-upper, whose brags miraculously turn out to be true, in the end.

The layout of the story reminded me of blogging. Ivanovich's journal entries begin with the corresponding date. In one of the entries he states that our desire to write comes from our innate need to share with others. As my high school English teacher used to say, "People inquire about your day not because they care. They ask so they can ramble about their own day."

There was an article published in the Atlantic a few months ago, wondering about the existential question many bloggers have faced: Why I blog? Here is my favourite excerpt from the article:

"As you read a log, you have the curious sense of moving backward in time as you move forward in pages—the opposite of a book. As you piece together a narrative that was never intended as one, it seems—and is—more truthful. Logs, in this sense, were a form of human self-correction. They amended for hindsight, for the ways in which human beings order and tidy and construct the story of their lives as they look back on them. Logs require a letting-go of narrative because they do not allow for a knowledge of the ending. So they have plot as well as dramatic irony—the reader will know the ending before the writer did."

My first posts were more impersonal, more about the impending humanitarian crises that concern me, such as Darfur. But with time I have been able to relinquish personal inhibitions, and, embarrassingly enough, have succeeded in broadcasting my single-status boo-hoos here. Blogging has also allowed me to connect with people who share similar interests, allowing me to associate with like-minded people. In some ways you guys know more about this so-called nerdy/dorkish side of me that I don't really reveal in real-life encounters. The reason I started this blog was because I realized I was running a risk of losing friends :). You see, I was boring them with my regular political rants. In fact, I have only told a couple of my friends about my existence in the blogosphere. I would find it really embarrassing if people who I associate with read my Random Ramblings.

"You can try to hide yourself from real scrutiny, and the exposure it demands, but it’s hard. And that’s what makes blogging as a form stand out: it is rich in personality. The faux intimacy of the Web experience, the closeness of the e-mail and the instant message, seeps through. You feel as if you know bloggers as they go through their lives, experience the same things you are experiencing, and share the moment."

Blogging, dorkishly enough, also defies the space-time continuum. People in the blogosphere are linked by time, but separated in space. (Sounds cheesy, right?) For instance, look at the time when Obama got elected, almost all of us wrote our myriad views on what his victory meant to us. This one event in time linked us, and prompted us to write something - positive or negative. A few years from now we can go back, and comb through our blog posts, and experience the immediate rawness we felt when these significant events, we blogged about, were unfolding...

Francophone

So, what do you do when you are missing your holidays? You ambush your friends with French songs you discovered when you were away.

In England, our mornings consisted of watching Enid Blyton cartoons (I grew up reading her books), and the news. But, in France, we almost always had their music channel on.

So here are the French songs I listened to every morning.

Toi + Moi by Gregoire: Doesn't the singer look like Justin Timberlake? Oooh-lala (I wonder, when this expression would get old). My friend, who works in Quebec, said that this song is very big in the French-speaking world, and they play it on the French radio here.

Toi et Moi by Tryo: I think, the video is very beautiful. And, the song sounds very sweet.

FM Air by Zazie: There are dressed up Indian people in the video. And, you can also see the blue Parisian street signs.

Peut-etre une Angine by ANAIS: Sounds cute!

Appelle Mon Numero by Mylene Farmer: This song drove my ageist sister insane. She believed, the singer is too old for this video. I don't care, they have maple leaves in the video. Go Canada!

Place de Wazemees by Bruno Maman: Sounds very beautiful and romantic. No idea what it's about.

It seemed that in England they were all about Leona Lewis. I don't care what people say, I find her very annoying.

Happy Carcass Day

Otherwise known as Eid ul Adha. In the Islamic lunar calendar we have two Eids (Christmas like festivals). Just in case you mess up on the gifts the first time around, you can make up for it on the second Eid. See, for instance, my friend didn't get anything for his girlfriend on the first Eid, which enraged her, as she had gone all out for his present. So, this Eid (I almost wrote Christmas) he got her three presents, and during the economic crisis too. So that ought to count for something.

Out of the two Eids, the second one, the one today, is my least favourite. The reason I call it a Carcass Holiday, because this Eid is a nightmare for non-meat-eaters, such as yours truly. See, on this Eid, raw meat is distributed among the poor and relatives. A portion of the meat is kept and cooked for big family feasts. Therefore, there are hardly any vegetarian options at these extravagant dinners.

So if you love meat and love food, I would strongly recommend you to find yourself a Muslim buddy, just like Bart Simpson, and indulge in the meaty goodness that this holiday promises.

If you have no idea why I just name-dropped Bart Simpson to legitimatize this Muslim holiday, I am talking about the Simpsons episode called "Mypods and Boomsticks". Here are a few clips from the episode (the only ones I could find on YouTube) to get you all caught up:





On his way home from the mall, narrowly escaping being attacked by the "phonies", Bart gets allured by the BBQ smell, coming from someone's backyard. He goes in to find a Muslim boy, Bashir, bbqing lamb. He loves the exotic cuisine, and befriends Bashir. But, then Moe et al fill up Homer's head with Islamophobic comments, and Homer suspects that Bashir's parents are terrorists.

The episode ends off with the following message:


Now that I have outted Muslims for loving meat, I hope PETA people don't turn into the Eid Grinch.

In all seriousness, this holiday is not that bad. There are opportunities for people to provide meals for orphans in impoverished villages around the world. So these poor children can also be a part of the holiday festivities.

Jan Wong: Beijing Confidential

Beijing Confidential is a memoir written by Jan Wong. She was one of the first few foreign students living in China during the Cultural Revolution, in the 1970s. Her book chronicles her return to China in 2004, and her struggle to find her fellow Beijing University student, who she reported to the Maoist authorities, when the student expressed her desire to move to America.

The book is very well written, and grabs you in from the first page. It reminds the readers of the ancient history of China, the rise of Beijing city under three imperial rulers (Yuan, Ming and Qing Dynasties), the ascend of Maoist Communist Party, and the birth of new China, which we all witnessed during this year's Olympics. The author travelled to China when they were still building the new Beijing International Airport, the largest in the world, in preparation of the Olympics.

This book also reminded me that the Cultural Revolution, and the Tiananmen Square massacre (1989) did not happen too long ago. The China we saw in August on our television screens is different from what it used to be a few decades ago. The book showed, how far China has come. There was a time when people were not allowed to own property, or keep pets, and the entire neighbourhood had to share one public latrine. During her journey, Wong couldn't help herself from drawing comparisons between the 1970's Orwellian Beijing, and the prosperous cosmopolitan that it is now. But these details are presented so beautifully that one does not get bored by the facts.

Tiananmen Square is such an important part of Chinese history. I first learned about the massacre in 1997, when I was watching the Hong Kong handover ceremony. I remember being glued to the TV, because I thought this was going to be the single-most-important milestone of our lifetime. I remember they had put up a big countdown clock in the Tiananmen Square, and the BBC reporter kept mentioning the massacre and the 'Tank Man'.

At that point I knew who General Mao was, thanks to the British show 'Mind Your Language'. The show was about new immigrants learning the English language, and having difficulty understanding the English figure of speech. One of the characters was an ardent Maoist, who always carried around General Mao's red book, and wore the Maoist suit.



So the same Tiananmen Square, where so many supporters of freedom and equality (mainly university students) lost there lives at the hands of their own Chinese military, also became the focal point of China's support and joy of Hong Kong's return to the mainland. Few years later, the same Tiananmen Square also brought together Chinese from all walks of life to celebrate their Olympic glory.

I am not saying we should keep living in the past, and keep blaming China for its past. But it is just astounding how far China has come, in just the span of few decades. Jan Wong provides an excellent unbiased account of China and Beijing in this least self-absorbed memoir. She doesn't just talk about Beijing's history and present, but also the people and how their lifestyle and attitudes have evolved over the years. I strongly recommend this book. Once I started reading it, I couldn't put it down.

My Brush with Celebrity

I went to the Hour taping yesterday. The guests were John Legend and Dr. Julio Montaner. John Legend’s interview was pre-taped, they filmed it at the Toronto International Film Festival.

However, the epidemiologist dork in me was very happy to meet Dr. Montaner. He’s the president of the International AIDS Society. He mentioned, 2.7 million people were newly infected with HIV in 2007. And, 2 million people died from AIDS in 2007. Dr. Montaner, who has persuaded the G8 leaders for more AIDS funding, said the world leaders are very forthcoming when it comes to introducing new policies, but when push comes to shove people in Africa, and now in Asia and South America still need our immediate help. Through his medical research he was able to find a link between the development of HIV resistance to nucleoside analogues and clinical progression of the disease.

The Hour’s host George Stroumboulpoulos talked about One Million Acts of Green (please check out the website). George Strombo was extremely nice in person. He hung around during the commercial breaks, and answered questions. He even stuck around after the show, so my friend and I got to have some one on one time with him :D. But I was totally left awestruck by his humility, and did I mention how nice he was. He made me all giggly and I turned totally red. Same thing happened to me when I met Keanu Reeves at TIFF. The charity I used to volunteer with got me and my significant other (who happened to be my sister, Hotchick^n) red carpet tickets to North Country’s world premiere. So we got to walk down the red carpet along with Charlize Theron, Frances McDormand, Sean Bean, and Woody Harrelson. So when Keanu Reeves made an unexpected red carpet entry I totally went weak on my knees, and all girly-giggly.

There is something about celebs that makes us, or at least me, all giddy and all girly. Now next on my list is to attend SNL and the Daily Show’s taping. I don’t even know what I would do if I ever had an encounter with Seth Meyers *gasping for air*.

Ever After

Marriage means different things to different people.

For some it is just practical. Two people with similar values coming together to build a life together. They don’t have any romantic expectations from each other. They find romance in the institution of marriage, and in the idea of planning a wedding, picking out the dress, the flowers, the venue, you know the whole shindig. The couple’s primary expectation from each other is simple and very vague, they want to look after each other (hopefully), and get busy right away.

In a culture, where your success depends on your marital status (apparently South Asians took the principles of evolution* a little too seriously) what are the singletons supposed to do? If someone has been out in the market for a while, people wonder why they are still single, wonder if there’s something seriously wrong with them.

During the dating process, there’s always this excitement and hope of meeting someone special, dare I say better. Better here is very subjective. But once you agree to tie the knot, you are also agreeing to give up on that fantasy. I know there is a possibility of your future spouse superseding your expectations, and actually appreciating, and loving you more than you ever imagined it was possible. But, sometimes fiction is so much better than the actual reality. The dream of being in a relationship, where you have the perfect combination of chemistry and compatibility, is very hard to actually have in the real life. So personally, I rather take my time now to make sure I don’t spend the rest of my life wondering what could have happened had I waited a bit longer. I don't want to rush into something that is merely A-OK, and not excellent. In the meantime, the idea and the hope of that special someone is more than enough, at least for now :D.

If a guy needs to impress a girl, he doesn’t need a flashy car or oodles of cash, there are so many other formidable traits that are far more important, such as a good sense of humour. I will take Andy Samberg any day over Mark Wahlberg.



A psychological study, conducted at McMaster University showed, the female participants preferred a witty guy over a hunkilicious empty vessel. Men, who participated, in the study, also gave the same feedback. But their definition of a funny woman was someone with the sense of humour to appreciate their hilarity. (Men, always thinking about themselves *shakes head*)

So we have already established what women want, let's turn to our good friend Darwin to figure out what men are looking for. Men dig symmetry. Men are drawn to symmetrical features, as they are indicative of healthy genes, and fecundity. No wonder it is so important for us ladies to make sure our eyebrows are matching :P (Great, I so don’t stand a chance now; thanks to my new eyebrow lady). Sexy symmetrical bodies help men in gauging reproductive health of their potential mate, and informing them whether the mating between the two would make them evolutionary fit, resulting in several healthy offspring.

I know in real life things are different, and a lot more complicated; we are all looking for a combination of different traits.

* In evolution an organism that leaves behind the most number of long living offspring is considered successful or fit.

Family Guy

I can't say I am a devout Family Guy fan, I have watched a couple of episodes here and there. But it's really amazing that a biased network like Fox would broadcast a show like Family Guy. The season premiere informs/reminds its viewers that Bush's closet is full of more skeletons than we ever thought. Now, here is a family you can never under-estimate.

Please read this article for more information :D.

Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World

Mad Men

Being sick has provided me with an excellent opportunity to catch up on Mad Men (ahh, that silver lining of strep throat). A cable drama set in the late 50's/early 60's. The first look reminded me of Frank Wheeler's Manhattan that I read about in Revolutionary Road. The writing is amazing and very poetic. I think this new series is right up there with Six Feet Under. The characters are very well-developed, and multi-faceted. I like it when characters are ambiguous and there is no right or wrong, and they are flawed with a swirl of goodness, something very Shakespearean about that.

The series mainly addresses the issue of sexism. Women in the office, as the secretaries, are shown as sex commodities, but one of them actually gets promoted to be a copywriter. The show is about an advertising firm, marks the beginning of the commercialistic corporate era. Peggy Olson's promotion from Don Draper's secretary to a copywriter, made me wonder if she's earning the same salary as her male counterparts. But, the issue of salary discrimination is not archaic. Last month, a study showed that men still earn more money than women, even though more women are going for big corporate jobs.

I am probably going off on a tangent here, but sexism still exists in our western society. For instance, the other day I went to drop off my mom, and the entrance to the parking lot was closed due to construction. The big deep yellow sign saying "Men are working" warded off people, and made cars turn around to park elsewhere. I know this is something very small, and I am honestly not picking a fight here, as I have never seen a female construction worker. But, it just caught my attention, and as this Time's article points out, these signs give the impression that only men are suitable for these jobs.

Same thing goes for when I take my car for a tune up or repair. The car service area is a very high testosterone zone, and last year for the first time I saw a female mechanic, and I just wanted to say, "You go girl!". Moreover, you mostly see men bringing their wife's/daughter's car for repair.

In Rwanda, for the first time ever we have a female majority in the parliament. The legislative world is still dominated by white old men. Supposedly, we have surpassed the feministic movement, and my generation falls under the category of Post-Feminism era, where we didn't have to fight for our rights. But, sexism does exist. In my university math classes, I was part of a small number, there were only 4 other girls with me. This meant I couldn't be late for my classes ;-), because the profs didn't have a hard time remembering me.

Turning to Canadian politics, I couldn't be happier for Elizabeth May, the Green Party leader. She was the only woman at our debates, and she held her ground, in both the English and French language debates. Stephen Harper's advisors have asked him to wear a sweater to soften his image, so he can tap into the female demographic, who have gone for the Liberals in the past. Is it really that easy to get our votes?! But apparently, this strategy is working for Harper, and for the first time, compared to the previous elections, a high number of women voters are supporting Harper's Conservative party. Same thing goes for Russia's Vladimir Putin. Last summer, the then President of Russia, released bare-chested photos of him, so he could be seen as Russia's sex symbol.

But, the same sexism, in some cases, can also work for people's advantage. For instance in Sarah Palin's case, whenever her foreign affairs knowledge is questioned, the right-winged Fox News accuses the media for being sexist. Joe Biden, instead of attacking Palin's inexperience, and incoherent 'verbage', focused his attacks on McCain, in the last week's VP debate. He didn't want to be labelled as a pompous sexist.

You cannot really hold men responsible of sexism, when we have made the four ladies of Sex and the City crusaders of female independence and success. No strings-attached sexual behaviour shouldn't be a determinant of how far we have come. Nor does a woman's need of Manolo Blahnik to feel empowered. Why aren't we selling movies like Erin Brockovich, the only movie that comes to mind, I am seriously drawing a blank here, to show that women are intelligent. Carrie Bradshaw should not be put on a pedestal, and reckoned to be our heroine, it's women like Margaret Atwood who write about strong intelligent female characters who deserve the status we have placed on these four Botox-tod women. Or women like Mukhtar Mai, and Somaly Mam, who have made women's education and freedom their primary goals, and because of their will power have managed to transcend the cultural boundaries their patriarchal society imposed on them.

Happy Birthday

Apologies for subjecting the rest of my (few) readers to this, but I just wanted to write a birthday post for my sister. Happy birthday hotchick^n (a moniker of her choosing).

Hotchick^n, here's an old Office cast interview for you. You would be happy to know that you still have a year to be in the 18-22 age bracket. So you still got it - that's what she said =D.

You ate my sandwich

Want to avoid the risk of having a Ross-like-nervous-breakdown, over a stolen sandwich? Purchase these mouldy bags:

Plugging Little Mosque

You know the rishta (arranged marriage) stuff is getting to you, when you start dreaming about potential guys before you have even met them.

This morning after eating sehri (early morning breakfast that Muslims eat in the month of Ramadan, when they are fasting from sunrise to sunset), when I fell back into deep slumber, I had a dream about this new rishta (suitor) who has come knocking at my door. Yes, prince charming may not come anymore, but creepy rishta dudes are very persistent. Since I had to postpone my trip to Nepal, turns out in my dream, I am boycotting this rishta dude, and I refuse to go downstairs to the living room to meet him and his family. So my parents send him up to my room. Don't worry the dream is very PG. I get mad at him, asking what he is doing in my room, as I don't even have my hijab on, and ask him to leave (apparently my subconscious ripped this dream off Little Mosque, the part where Amaar ends up seeing Rayyan without the hijab, scandalous eh?). But, the guy tells me that he just wants to be my friend. Yes, sadly even the guys in my dream are very cheesy. Anyways, in order to make sure I would call him back, the guy steals my first year calculus textbook, which for some reason is still sitting on my desk. The dream me is thinking that now she has to call this guy to get her calc book back. I have always loved calculus, but I never knew it would take a raggedy old calc textbook, to get me to call a guy.

Point of this dream, as Dr. Freud would say, I have unresolved feelings towards calculus. My first year prof should have given me my 4.0.

p.s. Forget flowers, bring me a calc textbook.